Of bosons and hadrons
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By now, I am sure you have heard that the largest particle accelerator ever built is about to go live. On September 10, the Large Hadron Collider (LHC) built by the European Organization for Nuclear Research (CERN) will attempt to circulate a beam through the 17 mile circular tunnel beneath the Franco-Swiss border. The first collisions are planned for late October when it will be officially unveiled.
Amidst doomsday reports of the possibility of a black hole being created by this collider and thus gobbling up the planet we call home, the physicists in the thick of things are working on improving their improv skills. The Wall Street Journal reported yesterday on how the CERN physicists are honing their communication skills by taking lessons in improvisational comedy. Some of the gems coming out of this meeting of minds with above average IQs:
She: “Do my bosons give you a hadron?”
“Two protons walk into a black hole.” (end of joke)
“A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much the drinks cost. The bartender replies, ‘For you, no charge.’ ”
more bad physics humor…
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/08/01/cuil_apology/
And here is the scientifically accurate LHC RAP - it has been around for a while
Is very funny. I have also a jock about scientist.
Nukular scientist walk into bar and crack joke. Nobody laugh. Bartender walk around bar, beat scientist to bloody pulp with cocktail shaker and throw pulp into black hole.
Buhahahahaha… just how you say crack me up ever time i hear it.
That rap was hilarious!! Love the physics humor. Back in college, my fellow physics majors were trying to come up with a physics version of a lewd bumper sticker; my suggestion was: “Physicists do it periodically.”
I guess I won’t mention that if I’m ever in Kazakhstan… Wait! I get it! That’s how the bartender makes a Bloody Marie (Curie)!
Ahh, I kill me… before the bartender does.
How about - “Physicists do it with uncertainty.” Or is that cutting too close to the bone?
Ooo, I think we have a winner!
Don’t the chemists do it periodically, too?